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Understanding Feelings Through NLP

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People generally attempt to describe their feelings in terms of pictures, metaphors or internal dialogue instead of actual physical sensations. So before we go any further, answer this question: "How do you feel, right now?"

Here are some of the most common types of answer to the question:

  • Judgements and Comparisons (words like good, bad, awful, fantastic, better or worse etc.) Remember – these are not feelings, they are descriptions.
  • Analogies such as "I feel an elephant is sitting on my chest", "like the cat that got the cream" or even ‘I feel like sh%t!" Again – these are not feelings, they’re descriptions.
  • Neutralizers are words like "fine", "OK", and "not bad" are also ways of keeping our feelings at a distance (i.e. like descriptions)
  • Emotions (which also are not feelings). They are generalized descriptions of a set of sensations. "I feel happy" or "I feel sad" is a step closer to your actual feelings but are also descriptions.

So what is a feeling?

A feeling is an internal sensation, like ‘warm’, ‘tingly’, ‘cool’, ‘tight’, or ‘loose’. You may feel one thing in one part of your body and something completely different in another, though we are often only aware of one dominant sensation in any given moment.

While you may prefer certain feelings to others, there is no inherent good, bad, right or wrong to what you’re feeling – a feeling is a feeling is a feeling. How you interpret those feelings however has a huge impact on how you experience life.

Have an NLP Coach who can train you to use feelings for your own good:
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Learn more about how to handle negative feelings via NLP from other articles:

NLP Techniques for Sales Improvement
Being able to turn negative feelings into positive motivations would be an advantage in a sales environment. 

NLP and Positive Thinking
If, as a result, the patient escapes the negative thought patterns and dysfunctional behaviors, the negative feelings may be relieved over time.

What’s in NLP Coaching?
Deal with upsets/negative feelings – Attract and maintain a relationship…

Using NLP To Release Negative Feelings
Have you ever been so angry or annoyed with somethingthat you couldn’t get it out of your mind? All you could think of was…

NLP Skills & Self Help
Our imaginations run riot as we review all the other occasions when we have felt stressed, and then they amplify all those negative feelings…

Related Blogs

    Anchoring NLP Techniques


    Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

    Viktor Frankl

    Anchoring is the art of setting a signal to elicit the same state in a person each time the signal is given. The concept comes from Pavlov, a psychologist who famously rang a bell before feeding his dogs. Pretty soon, he noticed that the dogs began to salivate ‘as soon as they heard the bell’ whether or not any food was present. Classical conditioning and stimulus-response theory grew from this experiment. The bell (an anchor or stimulus) set up a response or state (salivation) in the dogs.

    Rapport – NLP Rapport

    Rapport is the fundamental prerequisite skill for excellent communication

    Rapport is a bridge between our own models of the world and another person’s model of the world. When we create rapport with another person we implicitly agree to enter their model of the world and let them into ours.

    Rapport among friends is an unconscious and natural process. If you look about you will notice them sitting or standing in the same physical position as their friends. If you listen you will hear people using the same phrase or tone in their voice. These are all signs of the natural process of rapport.

    We can also consciously use this knowledge to begin to build rapport with other people. You could match their posture, verbal predicates, their breathing etc.

    As you are getting better at using your rapport skills so you will be able to notice the more subtle signs of good rapport.  When you’re practicing your skills with another person do the smallest possible thing to create and maintain rapport with another.

    Being in rapport with someone who is different from you may not be a comfortable place. It can feel quite strange, this is because we are extending our map of the world into places it has not yet been. We will be temporarily extending our beliefs and values and ways of thinking to join someone in their model of the world while we offer our model to them.

    If someone is angry or upset we can join them rapport fully by matching their energy.  There is a fine line between joining and escalating the situation.

    One of the foundations of rapport is your emotional state if you want to discover the power of influence, persuasion, happiness and health check out my 2 day course on hypnosis.

    >>>Hypnotherapy training courses Rapport


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